The Importance of Being Idle: June 2005

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Historys Greatest Error Message

"Windows was unable to detect a working keyboard. Please press F1 to continue"

Cheques In, Cheques Out

Well I finally went to bed at 4am last night, after an extended session of GTA followed by American Psycho... Surprisingly given the cummulative sickness of all that, I slept really well, but dragged myself out of bed at a semi-reasonable hour 'cos I had a few things to do.
So I payed yet another cheque from my parents into my bank (I wouldbe royally fucked without them, cos let's face it I have been waiting, what, four months now for the council to get off it's arse and give me the money they owe me), and I've taxed my car for the next year (that was another £170 I can ill afford to be honest, but my car is super cool, so I want to be able to drive it), and then I shopped.
That was some pretty hedonistic shopping, with chocolate, ice-cream, coke and sprite all in there, 'cos I've decided that I shall *ahem* be taking a few days off and re-starting my more healthy life-style at the beginning of July (so Friday then). In a moment of truly disturbing hero worship, I have finally found (and obviously bought) Bateman's (Patrick Bateman, the eponymous American Psycho) drink of choice, J&B whisky (which I shall naturally be drinking on the rocks - and then finding a hooker and cutting her arms off... NOT!). I wasn't actually looking for that either, I was gonna get some more vodka (ahhhhh Absolut, although I was tempted to try Finlandia...) but when I saw the J&B it was like the fulfilling of a decade long quest (which was admittedly very half-arsed for pretty much the whole decade, I mean I only started drinking a couple of years ago...) and it seemed the logical thing to buy.
Having already spent a reasonably large amount of money I was therefore rather pleased with myself when I didn't buy all three Godfather movies on DVD as well. They were on special offer (buy 3 for £19.99 or £7.99 each), but I resisted mainly because I already have them on video, and I haven't even watched them yet... Obviously if I do watch them and like them, then a replacement on DVD is clearly the way to go, but in the past I'd never been able to get more than an hour or so in... that said of course, I was with THE EVIL ONE, and she didn't even want to watch them so I was surprised I did as well as that, really. Seriously, you have no idea how hard it was to enjoy things that were not approved of! God she really made my life so fucking miserable... I mean there must've been good times once right, but I can't remember them at all, all the bad stuff just completely destroyed whatever there might have been. So maybe I'll watch The Godfather this afternoon then. But right now I am hungry!
Lunch AHOY!!!!!!

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Might As Well Face It, You're Addicted To Stuff

In what can only be described as an ever so slightly turn of events lightning struck a transformer (I think it was Optimus Prime, but I could be wrong - in fact come to think of it I AM wrong 'cos he died in the Transformers movie didn't he? Whilst he was being voiced by Orson Welles?) or something equally technical, and I have had to spend a couple hours without electricity! *gasp*
How did I cope you ask?
Well, those of you who've actually been to my house (so just Emily then) know that there are candles EVERYWHERE, so I just lit some candles, wound-up my wind-up radio, and read a book. It was actually pretty fun.
Of course as soon as electricity was restored the PC, TV and Xbox were switched on IMMEDIATELY, but that's just because I'm pathetic and addicted to modern technology. It'd be fun to try and spend the day without these things, but then, what if I miss something? Don't ask me what I might miss, I don't know, but something, and something of import too.
Ooooooooh the storm's a-circling, I can hear the thunder rumbling all around me. I wonder if I should turn the PC off again?
Nah, I didn't think so either.

Lightning In The Brain

And suddenly, in the middle of the afternoon, for no reason whatsoever I remember WHY I'm here, and I remember my purpose, and I remember who I'm waiting for and why she's worth the waiting. Sure it's gonna be a long and slightly pointless summer, but the reward will be worth it. And it's one hell of an opportunity for self-improvement.
*Suddenly happy*
So I watched The Terminal this afternoon, and for something billed as a light, frothy romantic comedy its actually quite dark and grown-up, and meticulously avoids all the usual Hollywood cliches. It was also extremely good.
And now I shall... actually I dunno what I'm gonna do now, but it'll be something, you can be sure of that.
;p

I Use A Word That Don't Mean Nothin' Like Looptid

Well, I forced myself to go outside and into town. The good things about the trip were...
i) I didn't spend any money
ii) I didn't hurt anybody, not even the guy I thought was following me
iii) I decided not to drink myself into oblivion this afternoon
iv) I listened to Digital Underground in the car
So those are all good things. But just all the people, out in couples and groups, enjoying the sunshine... it just made me feel more miserable and lonely, and also fed an unhealthy desire for carnage.
So I've decided that I'm going to stay inside again, and see if I can't find a way to address this problem I got goin' on. Why can't I keep my head together for more than a week eh? Fuckin' crazy man, fuckin' crazy.
I still want to go to the seaside though, but I don't want to go if I'm gonna feel like this when I get there.

Where Is My Supersuit?

Well so far today has been a roaring success. I finally woke up at half-ten, which isn't a great way to start a new day is it? I've been awake for almost two hours now, and still don't have any kinda clue what I'm going to get up to today, although I have a depressing feeling it's going to be an awful lot like yesterday...
Remember how many months ago I said I wasn't going to be excited about King Kong till I'd seen the trailer? Well, I've seen the trailer, and am now a little more excited than I was before, but surprisingly only a little. I was expecting to be thoroughly bowled over/blown away/whatever, but nope, I'm just thinking it looks potentially interesting. There is a possibility however that it's just my frame of mind right now, 'cos for the life of me I can't really think of anything all that exciting that could happen right now.
*sigh*
Okay, if there is anybody out there with a high-velocity rifle who would like to shoot me at some point during the day, you have my blessings. And you can have my DVDs and videogames as payment if you like. May they bring you more joy than they have me.
Now, where is my supersuit?

Monday, June 27, 2005

Choose Your Own Adventure

Ahhh so it was clearly "none of the above". Firstly I started re-re-re-re-reading American Psycho, which is never entirely indicative of a healthy state of mind, but whaddaya gonna do?
For my evening movie I opted for Guillermo Del Toro's The Devil's Backbone, an absolutely awesome spanish ghost story which everyone should see (well, if they want to see a ghost story set in an orphanage during the Spanish Civil War anyway - if you're looking for a romantic comedy you'll probably need to be looking elsewhere). I don't know why Del Toro's Hollywood output isn't up to this standard, whether its the scripts, the studios or just the challenge of directing in a second language I don't know, but frankly nothing he's done in America has been even close to this standard. Luckily his next film is also Spanish, so we can have high hopes for that too.
I wish I hadn't used "Choose Your Own Adventure" as the title for this most unadventurous post, I shoulda saved it for when I did something remotely interesting. Mind you, if I had to save it THAT long... ;p
And so to bed, said Zebedee.
(yeah, that's another 'on target' reference for all those of you who grew up in England during the 70's and have even the first fucking clue what the Magic Roundabout IS)

Shake Those Windows

Yeah that really was all there is to today. So let's all say a fond "Don't let the door hit you in the arse on the way out" to Monday, and try and make something outta Tuesday (and yes I realise I'm abandoning Monday pretty early, but what can you do? It's already so messed up it that it cannot be saved, so I think it's better to put it out of my misery).
My day pretty quickly devolved into an extended GTA:SA session, which was naturally extremely entertaining and extremely violent. Which was nice. I do NOT however want to be doing that exact same thing tomorrow, or Wednesday, or every other day after that. I need a life of some sort. Does anybody know where they come from?
I'd really like to go to the seaside for the day, play on the beach and go swimming in the sea and all that good stuff... but I'd rather stay inside at home and stab myself in the knee with a corkscrew than go on my lonesome. Actually that is slight hyperbole, by myself is the only choice I have after all, and I'm not actually stabbing myself... yet. The point IS valid though, I am bored. Bored of my life, bored of myself, just bored of everything. I want something to do, and I want someone to do those things with. And I want them NOW!!!! So no hurry.
But yeah, we've gotta start shaking those windows. Especially as my support network will be leaving me soon... who will I talk to all day when you've gone tiger? *sigh*
Sooooooooo there you have it. I am apparently feeling impatient, lonely, bored, pathetic and ermmm gangsta. And like I need a bath. At least that part I can manage.
I just wish I knew what this... ennui was, and how to make it go away. Without drinking huge amounts of vodka (which isn't on the cards either, cos I only have a tiny amount of it left).
Y'know, this isn't being one of my more coherent posts is it?
Okay, let's have a poll then! What movie should I watch in the post-bathing gloom? I shall present some choices;
A Fistful Of Dollars
The Terminal
Collateral
Goodfellas
Or something completely different? And no, not the Monty Python movie, just something I haven't thought of yet. Or I could just sit in the dark I suppose...

Is That All There Is?

So I'm back to sitting around aimlessly watching my life pass me by... God I love Mondays ;p
I kinda feel like I should be doing something of value, but I've no idea what that something might be. Hell something without value would be good. Anything at ALL...
Hmmm so I've lost my favourite tweezers, which isn't really massively exciting news, but if you've seen how small my bathroom is you'll wonder how on earth I managed to do such a thing. You'll also wonder why I have a favourite pair of tweezers, but I just DO okay? Deal with it.
So far then, I've done laundry, lost tweezers, had lunch, played video-games and... that's about it.
B O R E D !

Welcome To The Desert Of The Real

It's been a week since last I updated, and for a while there I really didn't think I was going to bother, but... y'know?
Okay so lets have a quick recap: blah blah blah blah blah.
I went to visit my bro for a few days while my folks were outta town, which was fun. It's not like we did anything particularly special (in fact it was entirely the usual: play video-games and watch movies) but it was still cool. I did try and elicit Stu's advice on a certain relationship matter, but he was as frankly useless as I anticipated he would be (his advice was to kill my conscience by whatever means necessary and then enjoy myself). I mean in some respects it must be great to be him, and to have whatever you like when you want it, but then he also has no conscience whatsoever (having succesfully destroyed it in his early twenties), and has never had any sort of long-term relationship either, and to the best of my knowledge has never remained friends with a woman longer than it takes to get her into bed, so its swings and roundabouts I guess. But me, oh I've been being exactly the sort of good boy I always am (and frequently despise myself for, even though it seems to be the thing that people like about me), and have actually had to fight off not one but two women this past week, which is absolutely unprecedented for me (not the actual fighting off you understand, or even the needing to, but that the situation has come up at ALL is what is unprecedented, my life being what it is), and also a lot more challenging than I ever imagined it would be, possibly due to pitiful feelings of neglect (you KNOW who you are! Write me a blasted email once in a while! ;p). Normally I'm all for Bill & Ted's advice ("do what Bill & Ted would do; choose both!"), but in this particular circumstance it really isn't appropriate...
Hmmmm what else?
Not a lot really, ermmm... its been sunny? Apart from Friday when it rained... Stu bought himself a new digital camera, and... nope I really don't have anything very much. Movie-wise we had a Christian Bale mini-season, taking in such varied delights as Batman Begins, The Machinist (feck me he's so dangerously terribly thin in that film...), Equilibrium (awesome movie despite being a total rip-off of everything from Brave New World, Fahrenheit 451 and Logans Run... and having Sean Pertwee in it) and of course American Psycho (which is okay-ish... but I think too pedestrian and conventional given the source material - I coulda made a much better film and I have little to no idea what I'm doing). There was a little rant entitled "The Art of Losing" I was gonna go off on, but frankly I'm still too tired and mellowed out for that sort of thing. The gist was Britain is crap because we lost the Empire and can't get over it, which may or may not be true. It's in the same vein as my other popular (*ahem*) rant about why having a monarchy depresses the national character by having us as subjects rather than citizens. I have a lot of rants though, as you've probably noticed.
Okay, that's enough of this crap, I've got to go and kill some russian gun-runners and generally make life in San Andreas hell for the ordinary citizens on the street. Time to get my gangsta on...

Monday, June 20, 2005

Bored + Stupid = Bored Stupid

Yeah, I am extremely bored right now. I don't know what I'm going to do this afternoon, but I need to do SOMETHING other than sit here all day. I've looked for jobs, faked my job diary for last week ('cos as you know I didn't really do a great deal) and I cut my hair, which was actually a mistake cos I ended up covered in little bits of hair stuck all over me until I looked like a caveman. Then I had to have another bath, which seemed very decadent, although it was also necessary cos I wasn't gonna go around looking like Ron Jeremy all day (sadly apart from being short and fat I don't resemble him in any way, at least not in the way most guys would like to - his money! *ahem*). Did you know there was a survey recently that said that short people do really badly at life? They don't succeed at work, get paid less than taller colleagues, and are rubbish in bed. I'm not like amazing short or anything, I'm 5'11" but I still think of myself as a short person. I don't have to worry about not succeeding at work or being paid less than anybody else, after all I don't have a job. I do fully expect to be rubbish in bed though. ;p

Hot Hot Heat

So yesterday I saw Mr & Mrs. Smith, and for the life of me I really can't remember anything about it. I mean, I remember the first 40 minutes or so, but then after that its very vague, until you get to the end and I thought "Eh?". I don't know if my mind was wandering, if I fell asleep or if the movie was just really bad, but I really can't remember the last hour or so. The part I remember at the start I really liked, and I've always liked the concept of the movie but... I think I might need to see it again (well, parts of it again, the rest of it for the first time). Falling asleep in the theatre would be really embarrasing though, so let's hope it wasn't that.
It was crazy hot yesterday, and looks to continue that way today. Except in Yorkshire, where my parents are on holiday, where there has been torential rain and flash-flooding, which is about typical for my parents going on holiday. Always used to be like that when we were kids too; it could be the hottest sunniest most brilliant summer EVER, but as soon as my Dad had two weeks off work and packed us all into the car there'd be rain, sleet, hail, snow, tornados... well maybe not the tornados, but the rest of it for sure. I don't think my folks have been affected in the floods though, so that's good.
So yeah crazy hot day again. I don't mind the heat, its the humidity that I really don't like, I just can't handle it at all - it just makes me even more lazy than I am naturally. It was so muggy last night it was just vile, I couldn't sleep at all and ended up playing GTA:SA till like 4am when it finally became bearable. Then of course it got hot again by 7am and I was up and what passes for awake again. Then I accidentally boiled myself in a bath that was too hot, and that's pretty much been the pattern for the day as a whole: try something, mess it up. And its not even lunch time yet. *fear* I think I may be a little over-tired eh?
OOOoooooh and y'know what else happened yesterday? The EVIL ONE called. Not spoken to her for a long old while, like getting on for six months. And unbelievably she wanted to ask me to do her a favour (nothing complex, just video something for her - which I actually did, although when I'll get round to actually posting the tape to her is anybody's guess, we all know I'm not exactly prompt on these things, even for people I like).
And ermmm that's it I think. I don't really know what I'm going to do with the rest of the day. I know there are some things I could do, but whether I will or not is another matter entirely. Only time will tell I guess.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

A More Up To Date Update

So I've just got back from seeing Batman Begins, and my head is still a jumble of overwhelmed neurons so thoughts aren't that clear, but WOW!
Okay, geek credentials first. HUGE Batman fan, who absolutely unreservedly hated both the Joel Schumacher and Tim Burton Batman movies, the former for being too camp and shite, and the latter for being hyper-stylised and shite. I was pretty glad when Batman & Robin seemed to kill the franchise once and for all, 'cos I've always thought the desire to see Batman on the screen pretty much renders the character ridiculous - you can see its just a bloke in a suit, and a bloke in a suit invariably looks a twat. What makes Batman scary (to criminals) in the comic books, is that they DON'T see him unless he wants them too, he's a mythical presence in the darkness, just waiting to pick them off. Also once you have a bloke in a suit the fanboy arguments start about him not talking right, or walking right, or fighting right... in fact once you get a clear look at him, its all gone wrong. So I was super wary when they announced the development of this new Batman movie, it just seemed that the studios had seen Marvel have a good time with the Spiderman and Xmen movies, and they wanted some of that money. However there were things which gave me much encouragement (the casting of Christian Bale, the hiring of the awesome Chris Nolan as director) and some things filled me with utter dread (the casting of Katie Holmes and early looks at the Batmobile). However, as it turns out pretty much everything was on the money (with the possible exception of Katie Holmes...). For a start, it almost looks like they set out to make a horror movie, and Batman is the monster: you never get a good look at him! There is one scene, early on, I think it's actually his first trip out in the suit, and it plays out EXACTLY like a slasher flick, with sudden movements in the foreground or background, thugs getting picked off in the shadows... even when he finally emerges and there's a fight scene, its not like any other fight scene in a Hollywood movie, its edited so fast and hard that you never get a sense of fight choreography at all, all you see is a black blur of violence and people getting their asses kicked. Then later on when Bats is 'interogating' someone (so that'd be hanging them upside down from a building, shouting and then repeatedly dropping them until he gets the answers he wants) Christian Bale produces this voice, this rasping snarl from hell... that is so perfect its almost unbelievable. I wonder if they did any post on it to make it more scary? Hmm, anyway, basically the whole movie is full of things like that, things that it gets so right it makes you wonder why nobody did them before. And Michael Caine OWNS Alfred, the one thing I'd thought the previous terrible shitty movies had got perfectly right - turns out that even that could be done better. Hell even the over-arching plot is pretty good, and doesn't suffer from the previous movies' "there's no such things as too many villains" ethos (even though it actually has lots of villains!). Oh and the 'escalation' at the end... that's the REAL kicker! Seriously, if the sequel was ready to go RIGHT NOW I'd have marched out of one screen and straight into the next without even bothering to go to the loo. Yeah, it was that good, and I want to see what happens next! Better than X-Men? Definitely. Better than Spider-man? Difficult to tell, I've only seen BB the once, but even on a first viewing its an equal to Spidey.
Wow, I wanna see that movie again!

Friday, June 17, 2005

Black & White Movie Day

First it was Citizen Kane. Now I don't know about you, but the first time I saw Kane, I don't know, twenty odd years ago, I expected it to be worth seeing beacuse of its place in history, but I didn't expect it to be any good, or indeed any fun. How wrong I was. There's a reason it's considered the greatest film of all time, and whilst a lot of that is because of its historical place, its technical skill and audacity, its performances and blah blah blah, its not all about that: mostly its just 'cos its a damn good story well told. If you haven't seen it, or think you know what its all about, let go of your preconceptions and go watch the damn movie! You'll enjoy it, I promise.
The second movie Schindler's List. Now, I've always avoided Schindler's List like the plague, because I've always figured "I know about the Holocaust, I don't need a three hour movie to depress the ass off me". But I saw it on sale today for £4.99 on DVD, so I thought what the hell, right, and bought it. Much like Citizen Kane all those years ago, my preconceptions were totally blown away. For a start, its not a movie about the Holocaust, its a movie about hope. I mean, obviously its about the Holocaust, but there's so much more here. I also thought it was extremely brave, and important, to humanise Amon Goeth. Sure, he's a bastard, capricious, vain, self-centred and lazy (he seems to feel that every new directive is yet another drain on his precious time, as if he didn't have enough to do) but he's also just a man, and I think more than anything its always been important to understand the the Final Solution was carried out by men, and not by mysterious personifications of Absolute Evil (although if you were to do even minimal research into the real Goeth you'll see that he's been soft-pedalled in the movie - the real man was cruel in ways you simply wouldn't believe in fiction). I expected to feel utterly traumatised at the end of it all, but I felt the opposite, I felt uplifted and hopeful for both my life and for us as a species. The only moment I cried, oddly enough, was at the end when the war is over and Oskar is leaving. They've written him the letter, given him the ring, and then he just breaks down, and starts working out how many more people he could've saved if only he'd sold his car, or his jewelry, or if he hadn't wasted to much on parties... I don't know if it's just the release of tension of knowing that no more bad things can happen or what, but from that point on I was just gone, and it gets worse when you see the real survivors laying stones on Schindler's grave. So yeah, I realise I'm about a decade late on this, but that is one damn good film and everyone should see it. What do you mean everyone already had? I was the last person on Earth...? Damn.
So yeah, those have been some timely movie recommendations today, Schindler's List (1993) and Citizen Kane (1941). Let no-one say I haven't got my finger on the pulse, that I'm not in tune with the zeitgeist, that I'm not down with the kids...

Messages From The Other Side Of The Brain

I had these really... odd, portentous dreams last night. Don't bother asking me what they were about cos I really don't remember anything specific about them, just odd jumbles of images and a feeling that they were trying to tell me something, something important. I mean, I'm not the kind of person who puts any stock into that sort of thing from any superstitious point of view, although I do from a psychological point of view. Its interesting that as a species we are evolved enough not only to think, but to be aware that we think and actually be aware of our own minds. Thats pretty hardcore eh?
Ermmmmmmm see I was gonna say something else here, but I feel oddly disconnected this morning, like I've had my brain removed and its been replaced with marshmallow, which is a weird feeling.
I got a red demand for my council tax this morning, which is annoying. It's funny that they're quick enough to demand payment, whilst I've been waiting THREE MONTHS now for them to pay my housing and council tax benefits. What's even more frustrating is that I obviously get full rebate on my council tax as I'm claiming JSA, there's no question about that, so what the hell is taking so long? They don't have to give me money or anything, just change an entry in file the file about me in the big computer that knows all, and then send me a letter telling me they've done it. I know technically I do have to pay until they award the benefit, and I suppose I will (but not until the very very last minute), but I'll be damn sure to try and claim that back once the award is made. Its not like I can afford to be paying out sixty quid for no appreciable reason, is it? Anyhoo, its not due till Tuesday, so I'll wait till Tuesday to pay it, 'cos you never know, something good might happen between now and then.
Doesn't look like I'm gonna be getting tickets for Live8 though, which sucks. Statistically I thought I'd got it all covered, the odds of my actually getting tickets were almost 1:1, but I guess I'm just unlucky eh?
*looks around*
Yep, sure looks that way, don't it?

Thursday, June 16, 2005

PC Gaming Sucks

It'd been a long time since I'd played anything on PC, even though for a long while there I was a pretty hardcore PC fanboy, so when I got into the mood for a WWII shooter I thought I'd go back to Call Of Duty and carry on with that. Boy that was a mistake. It crashes every five minutes or so, and its not just a problem with my system or anything like that, forums are full of people trying to get this bastard game to run consistently. Over the past two days I reckon I've spent more time either rebooting from hardlocks, or just generally messing about with BIOS and driver settings in an attempt to play the game, than I have actually playing it. That said in even little tiny five minute bursts CoD is something to behold. I've just started the Russian campaign, and the trip across the Volka, huddled into a barge with dozens of other conscripts, listening to commisars trying to stir our love for the motherland while the Germans shell and bomb our flotilla to smitereens, is truly a shaking moment. Of course, reaching the comparative safety of the shore and joining the line for weapons only to be given a handful of bullets and told to follow the guy with the rifle and take it from him when he dies... that was some bad news. Not that having a gun really made life any better... But for all that it stirs my blood, the stability of the game itself stretches my patience, and reminds me of exactly WHY I don't game on the PC anymore: its a fucking nightmare. Will it run on my system? Will it run well? What texture setting should I use? What kind of pixel shader does my graphics card have? How much hard-drive space will the install take? It's gonna install the bloody StarForce thing too? I need to update my BIOS? And sound drivers? And graphic card drivers? And so on and so on... just give me a console any day - at least I know the game runs on my machine exactly as well as it runs on everybody elses and I can just pop the game in, sit in my comfy chair and we're away to gaming land.
So, yeah, it's official: PC gaming sucks. HARD.

Fake Bomb Update... No, Wait, It's A Real Update, But About The Fake Bomb

Okay, I've seen the fake bomb now (it was just on the news), and it consisted of a tupperware box, a nine volt battery, an alarm clock and a big lump of blue-tac. See, if I'd seen that I wouldn't have thought it was a bomb, I would've just thought it was a crazy man with a tupperware box in which he keeps random things. Although I would've wondered why the guy was carrying a lunchbox full of blue-tac around unless he was planning on putting up and awful lot of posters, and would probably have backed away from him, making no sudden moves...

Great Questions In History

Its the summer-time, and that means the newspapers indulge in their traditional summer sport of embarrasing the British security services. This weeks scam involved a reporter pretending to be a cadet at Sandhurst military academy, and secretly filming Prince Harry! *gasp* More shockingly still, he was, at times, carrying a 'fake bomb'. Now, there are two things worthy of note here. Firstly, if you want to fool British security services then you all you have to do is tell a lie, and they will be completely flummoxed. I think that's largely to do with the fact that we're British and just don't go in for that sort of thing *ahem*, and damn it but we just expect the same from Johnny Foreigner. The second thing is a 'fake bomb'. This seems to come up quite a lot in what the tabloids laughingly call journalism these days, and I wonder what exactly comprises a fake bomb. I mean, how much effort has gone into it? Is it just that the journalist decides that, I dunno, his pen is suddenly a bomb and *shock horror!* nobody around him realises this? Does he have an empty cardboard box with the word B O M B written in crayon on the outside? Is it a crude construction of chicekn wire and papier mache? Or does he have an elborately constructed actual honest to god real bomb that is missing one crucial component that renders it an overly complex bookend? I have no idea, I just wonder that's all. I mean they always make such a fuss over the fact that nobody ever notices this fake bomb, but I just wonder if it has any actual qualities that'd make you think it was a bomb (like explosives, for instance, which the sniffer dogs could actually detect) or is it all just a stupid lie? My guess is stupid lie, but I'd be interested to know the truth.
The other funny item in the news these days is France picking a fight with us over the EU rebate. We've had this rebate for twenty odd years now (oddly enough we're not keen on a national level to subside French agriculture) and while the rest of Europe always looks at us funny at the big get togethers, nobody's ever done anything about it. However as Chirac has accidentally gutted the whole European project by failing to achieve a yes vote in his country's constitutional referendum, which has prompted a pretty massive Europe wide political crisis, he has wisely decided to distract everybody by going "Look! Britain gets a tax rebate!" like nobody had ever noticed that before. Its such a transparent ruse that its actually quite depressing that its working and demonising Britain throughout Europe once more. Sadly it seems this whole EU summit is going to be spent pointlessly arguing about a budget that doesn't even need to be ratified until 2007, while there are more immediate problems right in front of us in the here and now.
It's lunchtime and I haven't done a single bloody thing all morning (well, I played Call of Duty quite a bit, but that's not especially productive). That's not really a good way to start the day is it?
Blah.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

This Is Sky Captain: I'm On My Way

Finding myself at the by now traditional something-of-a-loose-end this evening, I decided to rewatch Sky Captain & The World Of Tomorrow, along with all its associated DVD extras, and frankly all I can say is 'Wow!'. Clearly the movie divides people in an extremely marmite way (you either love it or you hate it), but as someone who loves it (the movie - I despise marmite) seeing the insane level of work and dedication that went into it's making is awesome. I really do mean insane too. For example, Kerry Conran spent two years rendering a six minute proof of concept on his home computer as a showreel for the studios, and was actually fairly set on doing the entire movie this way even though it would've ended up taking upwards of twenty years to finish. The people who did end up being recruited to do the CG work were almost exclusively fresh out of college on their first show, and most of them spent two years almost working for free (on second hand equipment, all stuffed into a single warehouse building) bringing their ideas and enthusiasm and expertise to a project that really was a labour of love for all involved. The look of the film (filmed in colour, then bleached to black and white, then recoloured by hand to give a kind of 'colourisation' look to the whole thing) is little short of astounding and its so chock-a-block of references to movies and serials from the 40s and 50s that it's a geeks dream come true. I dunno if anyone'll like it or not (my brother for instance reckons it one of the worst films ever made - which it clearly isn't. Battlefield Earth is on TV right at this minute, now thats one of the worst films ever made...), but if the idea appeals to you even vaguely then I urge you to check it out.
Have I blogged about this before? No I can't have, cos I remember buying the movie in Woolies in Rushden, so I still had a job, which means I didn't have a blog.
Y'know I've never seen Battlefield Earth before, but it really is unbelievably piss poor so far. And a thousand years in the future special effects are really bad apparently. I mean like, Battle Beyond The Stars bad. Although I actually really like Battle Beyond The Stars - I think it was my first (and probably last, to be honest) Roger Corman (he was producer I believe) movie, and a gateway to a world of cheap knock-offs of other peoples projects (it's like [Magnicent Seven + Star Wars - budget] * Exploitation = FUN) . I always liked the Nestor best, although as I've got older I've developed something of an *ahem* appreciation for Saint-Exmin of the Valkyrie (who's line "Have you ever seen a Valkyrie go down?" took on a whole new meaning the last time I saw the movie - I was very sheltered as a child... actually I'm very sheltered as an adult too), not that blondes are usually my thing, but y'know... Anyhow, back to Battlefied Earth. Despite supposedly being some kind of evil, humankind enslaving alien, John Travolta is playing himself, as usual. Oooooooooh now we're in adverts, and scarily even the cheapest of those has higher production values than the movie surrounding them.
Okay, that's enough stream of (un)conciousness bullshit for now. Remember todays salient points:
i) watch Sky Captain
ii) I've lead a very sheltered life
iii) John Travolta ALWAYS plays the same character: John Travolta
We are adjourned.

Shatterproof Is Not A Challenge

Hmmmm I don't really know what to write about today, cos it's just bein' kinda... there y'know?
I've done next door to nothing (hung out with Jules for a bit, it was the first time she'd been out for a couple of weeks, and she's back to hospital on Friday - apparently they still can't decide what's wrong with her, so she's having a biopsy, and that can't be good can it?) and its already late afternoon. I'm buggered if I know where the day's gone...
So I bought the most MASSIVE Yorkie ever, which is like the size of a baseball bat (well, a very small one) - thats a lot of chocolate, but I'm man enough for the job! ;p Blimey actually I might now be, the chunks are so massive I can only just get them in my mouth... Maybe its not supposed to be eaten, maybe its for decorative purposes?
In an interesting follow up to yesterday's rant about Jacko, I note that members of the jury said that they believed that he HAD molested boys in the past, but that in this case there was reasonable doubt and so they had to acquit. Like I said yesterday, no guilty doesn't mean you're innocent, it just means they could prove their point... It was also interesting to hear Jackson's lawyer say that "he'd learnt his lesson". Which lesson exactly? Did he learn not to leave himself vulnerable to people who want to manipulate him for their own ends, did he learn not to share his bed with small boys, or did he learn that the its best to make sure you kill them after you fuck them so they can't tell anyone? "Learnt his lesson" is just a bit vague for my liking, but it seems to imply that he's had a lucky escape there.
OMG that chocolate is so filling, I've only had three chunks (three enormous bits each the size of a monkey's head, mind) and I feel right bloated. Bleh, no more of that for today.
Well, yeah, that's about the whole of my day so far then. Been great, eh?

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Waiting, Waiting, Spend All My Life In Queues & Waiting

I went out for a bit, bought some essentials (like... apples and soap), had lunch, came back and the inspector STILL hasn't been, which sucks. I hate the odd feeling of being trapped while you're waiting for something to happen, especaially as I'm waiting for somebody to come into my personal space...
I wonder what I'm going to do with the rest of the day?

Outside The Asylum

Oh joy another morning of application forms! One of them this morning asked me what my greatest achievement was, which I thought a really nasty question. I mean, for a start, I've never achieved anything at all, but even if I had what sort of thing would you actually be proud enough of to mention it on a job application? I mean, sure if I'd cured cancer, or discovered a new country or discovered a grand unified theory of everything then I'd be proud of those things, but everyday achievements? Yeah I did a really good job cleaning the bathroom last week...
I can't let the whole Michael Jackson thing go without some comment. Firstly, I honestly didn't think he was going to be found not guilty on all counts, I expected him to be convicted of SOMETHING, most obviously supplying alcohol to minors. Clearly the jury knows more about the actual evidence in the case than we the public do, and their opinion that they had little choice but to clear him after the testimony of Janet Arvizo who was obviously trying to play the situation for the money seems to have been what swung the case. However, she wouldn't have been the first, he'd settled with what, four other families? I don't know, I mean maybe in this instance he wasn't guilty, I honestly don't know, and I know the old adage "where there's smoke there's fire" doesn't always follow (after all I was fired for stealing things and I didn't steal stuff, so clearly its not fool-proof), but I do believe he that he has done these things before, and he will again if given the opportunity (and listening to what rabid fans are saying this morning, he will have the opportunity again and again and again...). What surprises me is the number of people who are willing to apparently forgive his obvious prediliction for small boys because "he had a strange childhood". Well, ALL paedophiles have strange childhoods, thats what makes them the way they are, and yet nobody in the media feels sorry for them, or even makes much of an effort to understand them when it's easier to demonise them. I'd also like to point out at this point, that being found "not guilty" doesn't mean you're innocent, all it means is that they couldn't prove you did it.
In other crazy news, people with 4x4s who never leave the comfort of the town centre need no longer fear ridicule as they can buy spray on mud to make it look like they were off-roading this weekend. The wankers.
I'm sure there were other things that had exercised my ire this morning, but they seem to have (mercifully) slipped my mind, cos it will prevent more extensive and incoherent ranting.
I'm supposed to be having a flat inspection this morning, and I hate those. I mean, its not like its a big deal, I just kinda feel like I'm hanging around waiting for something, even though I can just be somewhere else. In fact I think I'll do that, be somewhere else. Wonder if I should wear a coat...?

Monday, June 13, 2005

Jinxed

It seems that the universe doesn't want me to do anything useful today, and who am I to resist the natural order of things?
Okay, so I gave up on vacuuming, quite reasonably, and decided instead to do some gardening. Now, I have an ambiguous relationship with gardening. I enjoy the work and all and I like the results on the rare occasions when my garden has looked good through my intervention. What I don't like about my garden in particular is that I can't go into it without all my neighbours feeling the need to come out and engage me in pointless and time-consuming conversation. Normally I'm all for pointless and time-consuming as you know, but I want my garden to be a private space dammit, so I wish they'd just leave me alone to get on with whatever it is I'm gonna do. Luckily (?) my voice is sore today almost to the point of rendering me mute, so after a few hoarse comments they left me alone. Unfortunately that was the point at which my lawnmower also decided it didn't want to work anymore, so I managed to mow a lawn and a half. And then it rained like it was the end of the world, so I just gave up.
Anyway, in the brief period when things were working, I wasn't being bugged by my neighbours and it wasn't raining, I was vaguely enjoying my garden labours, and realising that the reason I don't do more of it, and do it better, is that I really don't have the first clue what I'm doing out there. Which plants are good, and which ones aren't? I have no idea, they're all just... green... to me. Does having a flower make it a flower? I don't think so, I think a flower is just a part of the reproductive process of plants... That leaves me with what exactly? Lots of green things that I don't know what to do with. I pulled up loads of them almost at random, but it certainly looks a lot less cluttered than it did before, so that can't be bad. I don't think. And my lawn, jaysus, I KNOW that's a mess but I don't have the money to fix it (which is of course a common thread in most things right now) so what do I do? Just kinda cut it (until the mower gives up the ghost anyway) and... leave it. Its just fire-fighting really, trying to prevent disaster. Still, it was an interesting new insight into gardening, which was cool.

Fire! Fire!

So y'know my hoover kinda caught fire last week? Well, I thought I could fix it, but apparently I was over-optimistic in this assessment, as its now been even more on fire, and I think I should just give up and buy a new one. Except I can't really afford a new one right now, but I also really need to have one, not least because I've got a bloody housing inspection tomorrow. Arse.

Procrastination

I have about a million things that need to be done today, and I don't really want to do any of them...
So I'm kinda wasting time until I can convince myself it's too late to even bother starting so I can waste the day with a 'clear' conscience.
Or I suppose I could just get off my arse and at least do some of my tasks...

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Awake Is The New Sleep

I feel like crap today.
My throat is rough as hell, and I'm coughing and spluttering and just generally feeling unwell and run-down. And I'm tired, which is ridiculous cos its not like I dragged myself out of bed early or anything, quite the reverse, I forced myself to go back to sleep when I DID wake up early.
I hate being sick.
I'm starting to hate weekends too.
It's not that I'm less isolated during the week, cos I don't really think it makes any difference, its just that I seem to find it harder to occupy myself over the weekend, and they seem to stretch on endlessly and pointlessly, a bit like my life as a whole really. See, I told you I was feeling pitiful, didn't I? I just wish I could go to sleep and wake up when there's something worth being awake for.
Jaysus, when did I get to be such a miserable c#*t?
On the plus side I watched Jean-Pierre Jeunet's A Very Long Engagement today, his second movie with Audrey Tautou, and it is just as marvelous as all his other films have been (well, maybe not Alien Resurrection, but the funny, quirky one's in french anyway). Despite being based on a novel (by Sebastian Japrisot) it still feels very Jeunet, almost like Amelie Goes To War in fact, but that doesn't weaken it in anyway. It's more visually stunning than anything you're ever seen from Hollywood (as is always the way with Jeunet), and packed with incidental detail, in both the sets, settings and the supporting characters. Just go watch it, I promise you everybody will love it. Unless you for some unfathomable reason didn't like Amelie, in which case I suggest a visit to your physician, cos you're heart has clearly turned to stone. The subtitles seemed to play pretty fast and loose with the translation though, even my limited french could spot some occasions when the subtitles were more a summary than an actual translation of what was said, but I guess translation is as much an art as anything, so who can say? We should count ourselves lucky it's never been dubbed into english...

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Out With The Old, In With The Useless

I know, I know, I didn't post yesterday and I really don't have a good reason for that except, well, GTA:San Andreas has arrived on Xbox and all bets are off.
I tried hard to clear my schedule yesterday, working hard in the morning to clear a few more job applications, keep up with my finances and all that sort of thing. That left the afternoon and evening free to dedicate to GTA:SA.
My first impressions were actually less than positive, but that's always the way when you start off a new GTA game; you're wussy, don't have any weapons or cars, you're in a strange and un-familiar city... they always start like that. I have to say though, over the past day I have completely changed that opinion. This is the ULTIMATE GTA, at least until the next one! I've barely explored a fraction of San Andreas, I hardly know more than a few blocks around my home without getting horribly lost, but the city itself is vast.I mean huge, insanely huge, and so incredibly fully realised... the differing architectures, the wealth of incidental detail, its just staggering. On top of that, I'm finding a that you can do all the things you used to be able to do, and then some! Sadly I can feel the familiar pull of GTA obsession beginning, and this one is gonna be a doozy!
So essentially I've spent two days playing San Andreas and having virtual adventures that nobody wants to hear about... Okay, I'm just gonna say this one thing. I went into a bar just down the street from my crib ('cos CJ's all gangsta, y'know?) and I started playing pool with this guy (yeah, I know, playing a game in a game...) and we started gambling and I was kicking his ass. Then damn fool that I am, I upped the ante considerably figuring I'd take the guy for all he'd got, and predictably he absolutely destroyed me. I'd been hustled. Now, there are three ways you can react to that. You can admit your naivity and just walk away, you can not realise you've been hustled and keep playing or you can do what I did: beat the guys brains out with a pool cue and take his money. Now that's thinking outside the box...
This hasn't been the only thing in my head though, there've been other things.
Sadly I can't remember what any of them WERE right at this minute, which'll teach me not to post as soon as I think of something.
Y'know, for a programme that claims to be the definitive history of 'black popular music' Soul Deep (which is in its last few minutes as we speak, after six excellent weeks) seems to have a bit of a blind spot where hip-hop is concerned. Up until like 1975 the show was meticulous in its detail and very perceptive when it came to tying musical and social trends together, but somehow hip-hop, without doubt the most influential musical and cultural phenomenon of the past quarter century is just being dismissed in favour of Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown. Eh? Shame really, cos the rest of the show had been excellent.
The brilliant Steve Carell (aka Brick Tamland in Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy) is starring in a new film called "The 40 Year Old Virgin" about... actually its fairly self-explanatory what its about. Anyhoo, the thing that most got my attention was the line early in the trailer when one of his friends asks him how that could be, and he says "After a while you just stop trying". That's pretty much the truth of it, you just give in, accept that its not for you, never gonna happen. I don't know if it makes you necessarily more juvenile, I don't know if it alters the way you behave with people or not, I just know that you give up. Looks like it's gonna be really funny though! The film, that is. And I'm not gonna be forty for another four years and three months, so there's still time!
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes (see, things are coming back to me!). I don't know if its for real or not, it does seem awfully convenient what with them both having big summer movies to promote, especially given what we know about Tom's tendency to treat these things as a business arrangement. However, there's really no reason why it couldn't be for real; they're both extremely attractive people, they have commonality in their work, and the age difference isn't something I give any credence to (but then I wouldn't would I? lol). I think the media should stop judging the whole thing though, cos Tom's behaviour and clear desperation in trying to impress upon us the reality of their love is really starting to get a little crazy. I foresee it being only a matter of weeks before he goes on a killing spree with an automatic weapon in a desperate attempt to 'prove' his love. So, let's just give 'em a break eh? Besides any (straight) guy with any sense wants to do Katie Holmes, and we ALL know at least one girl who likes older guys, now don't we (mentioning no names, but you know who you are)? Anyway, the rules don't apply to movie stars, look at Brad Pitt. No guy in his forties should look that good. The unutterable bastard.
Okay, I'm outta here, its movie time!

Thursday, June 09, 2005

A Little Bit Of Politics/Tree Hugging Hippy Rant

So the government wants to do away with road tax altogether and charge all drivers based on how far they drive. They intend to do this by monitoring us all by satellite. Now for a start, I don't want the government knowing where I (or my car) is at all times, its none of their business where I go and when I go there. Ignoring the civil liberties angle, I do understand the very very urgent need to do something about pollution, but this isn't the way to do it. Firstly, the technology isn't there no matter how much the government tells us it is. Secondly, over the past decade the government has done an awfully good job of dismantling both our national economy (it no longer creates wealth, it merely recycles it), and our public transport system (although to be fair every government fucks this up). Now we have an economy of short-term, low pay jobs, which the government smuggly proclaims give us a flexible economy. Obviously no MPs have actually worked any of these 'flexible' jobs, or they'd know what its like to earn less than you need to cover even the basic costs of living on a monthly basis... Still, my point is that the low-paid workforce, and make no mistake these are the people who are going to suffer under this new scheme (I can't imagine any high-mileage salesmen will actually be paying their own bills, that'll be paid for by their employers), who need to be 'flexible' are going to be charged for that flexibility when they drive to their place of employment everyday. Nice eh?
How do we do things differently?
Well it needs a massive change in the way this country (and lets face it, all other developed countries) do business. We need a proper national policy for a fully integrated transport system, expansion and improvement of the rail network, trams, more buses, more cycle and pedestrian friendly town centres... And we need to change where we live. Once upon a long ago, people used to live right near where they worked. People lived in towns and cities, and worked in those same towns and cities. They lived in communities. Now people live tens of miles away, in little villages and drive to and from work everyday. This has two effects. Firstly it has pretty much gutted our towns, leaving them with collapsing and abandoned facilities, shops and what have you, and run down housing. It also means that rural communities suddenly find themselves priced out of the market in the very place their family has lived for generations, displacing that population to the run-down cities... All this leads to the insular, dissociated and damaged country we live in today, a place where there are no more communities, just individuals.
I know its a big problem, and this is only one little country. We need to think about new forms of transport, worry less about performance and be more concerned with pollution. Who needs a car that goes from 0-60 in 4.6 seconds, or has a top speed in excess of the speed limit in any country you care to name? We need to change the way we buy our goods, the amount of non-recyclable packaging thats used. We need a proper recycling culture. We need to restrict the pollution from our industries, and by extension the industries of other nations. I don't for one second think that we could destroy the earth, or all live thereon, but I think we can make it uninhabitable for us, our children and our childrens children ad infinitum.
We need to protect this small blue/green marble floating in space, its the only planet we've got.

This Must Be A Thursday, I Never Could Get The Hang Of Thursdays...

I think that by now my dislike of company application forms is well known, but the very worst of a bad lot are ones for civil service posts. They ask a huge number of bizarre things (like can they contact your high school - I mean, yeah if you like, but I haven't been there for HALF MY LIFE, so I'm not sure anyone would remember me), and expect you to remember precise details for all manner of things in your past, things that surely no-one knows. What's worse is that they then give you mulit-part essay questions designed to demonstrate your competencies in key areas. Can you remember the last time that, as a group, you had to take into account the feelings of one of the groups members, how you mediated with them, and what the eventual result was? No, neither can I...
Still, I bluffed my way through it (lets face it, I've zero chance of getting that job anyway, so its not really important) and now it is posted and away. Let's try to avoid any more of those in future.
My meeting/interview this morning wasn't great, in that it didn't result in the offer of a job or further interview, but it was good overall because now I'm on the books of two agencies, and its always nice to have somebody else do all the work for me. A suit wasn't a great idea this morning though, cos DAMN it was hot.
There was a documentary on TV last night about a woman with Dissociative Identity Disorder, what used to be known as multiple personality disorder, and it was really really weird and scary. Even though she's 31 her main central personality is only about four years old, and she has four 'helper' personalities that look after her and do things for her a lot of the time. None of the additional personalities are even remotely stable, they're combative and abrasive (although thats hardly surprising, the amount of abuse the poor girl suffered as a bairn was heart breaking), and even weirder, they all have their own 'room' inside her head. And when they go to their room she makes a little door slamming noise. Watching the various personalities argue about things and physically restrain the woman herself was just... I mean it should be sad and horrific, and it is, but its also fascinating. If we could work out how the additional personalities form, then I reckon we'd know a lot more about the human mind than we do now.
Ho hum.
Well I think that's all the news thats fit to print for now. I have, as ever, more applications to do, but I just don't have the energy or enthusiasm for 'em right now. So I think I'm gonna go and do... something else.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Weeping and Gnashing of Teeth

Oh boy somedays I just do not know what to do with myself.
I woke up at like 7am, got up, did job applications, some laundry, went and signed on, came back, did some MORE applications and its still only 12.30pm. I don't want to do any more job related things, I'm just so totally not in the mood anymore, but I don't have even the first clue what I am going to do with the rest of my day.
Its a beautiful day out too, sunny and calm and hot, but not too hot... I kinda want to go play outside, but I don't really have anyone to play with and that sucks.
I'm pretty pissed off and frustrated with my life, stupid bloody thing.
I'm in the sort of mood where I eat too much, so this is going to be a big test for me.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Suddenly Bored

Just comin' up to 3pm and I can't think of anything else to do...

Scarily Productive Morning

So I got up early and went to my interview. As usual I'd over-estimated the evil of rush-hour traffic, so I was there half an hour before necessary. Luckily I'd taken a magazine with me, so I sat reading and listening to the radio before I made my grand entrance.
That was when it all started to go wrong.
See, I'd done my company research based upon the address of the people I'd applied to and my scouting trip yesterday. What I hadn't done was actually get out of the car and go into the store, cos if I had I'd have noticed something. The actual place I'd applied to was a concession within the main store, and that revelation suddenly rendered all my research redundant as I'd researched and prepped on the parent company, and not the actual place I was looking to work, the concession within the main store. Now, there's a certain sort of relaxtion that comes over you when you realise you've failed before you even begin, so I just went in there and was calm and thoughtful and on top of my game. Damn me if it didn't go well though! The bloke said up front that he liked me, my attitude and my enthusiasm, although he was worried that HR would balk at how my career at the BHF ended. Still, it was good and I was pleased, and I should hear something by the end of the week.
When I came home I'd got a cheque from my parents (thank god for them, I'd be fucked without their help right now) so I counted out all my coppers and whatnot (which amounted to a massive £18.83) and went and paid that all into the bank, which was good. Then I bought some stamps and posted the dozen entries I'd made for the draw to get Live8 tickets. I was going to buy some MacCheese too, but looking at the calorie information just freaked me out (800! for one thing! I barely ate that many calories in the entire of yesterday!) so I decided against.
And now its now, time for lunch and then... whatever it is I get up to this afternoon! Yay!

Monday, June 06, 2005

Indoor Fireworks (Fire Extinguisher Not Included)

So I really did think I'd do something useful this afternoon, and decided to clean the bathroom. This was a somewhat experimental move as I was using a new bath foam thingummy rather than my normal cleaner. I'll be using the normal cleaner again in future though, cos the bath foam thingummy (BFT from now on) produced such fumes that I thought I was going to pass out, and had to open all the windows and let it air for a quarter of an hour before I dared go back in there. And of course once you've done that the BFT doesn't clean anything properly and it was just a total pain in the arse. So next time, it's back to Flash!
What was worse though, was when I got the hoover out. I hoovered a little, there was a wailing noise and I looked round to see brilliant blue and green electrical sparks before my hoover's motor gave up the ghost and caught fire. This was a bad thing. For a start, I don't have a hoover anymore, or rather I don't have one that is functionally useful, and also my bathroom is only slightly cleaner than it was when I started. So that wasn't a great way to spend the afternoon.
I don't know what on earth I'm going to do with the rest of the day. I'm about as prepped for the interview as I'm going to get (so not very then), all I'd be doing there is having things run round and round in my head, which is no help at all. I hate the whole waiting part, I'll be happy when its over no matter how it goes (although clearly I'll be happier if it goes well than if it goes poorly).
I think I'm going to apply for tickets for the Live8 concert in Hyde Park next month. Its not so much that the bill is all that good (although there are... twelve bands on the bill I want to see, including The Killers, Muse and Razorlight) but also because it'd just be interesting to have something to do for a change, a bit of an excuse for a day out, and more importantly I think the cause is one worth supporting. I don't know who I'd go with, although I really doubt I'll get any tickets so its not likely to be a problem. Still, it's worth a try eh?
And so to... I don't know. It's not even 7pm yet and I am thoroughly bored. I mean I love movies and reading and video games and all that, but bloody hell I need something else to do before I go crazy!
Are we ready to sing Kim Jong-Il's song from Team America:World Police?

I'm so ronery
I'm so ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone
There's no one
Just me onry
Sitting on my rittle own

*cry*

Pizza of Death

Yesterday I had the worst pizza in the entire history of the world, and I think it's pretty much put me off food completely, which is a good thing. I went out this morning and bought lots of fruit, which is pretty much what I intend to eat for the rest of the week. Of course, how that resolution will go is anybody's guess, but right now that's how I'm feelin'. I still feel sick from that bastard pizza, it really was a disastrously unpleasant experience. Time for a few grapes I think.
I've been out and scouted my location for the interview tomorrow. This one is for a discount supermarket chain, so its not even close to my ideal, but the pay is pretty good (for retail, anyway) and I can probably get with the no frills appraoch although its not really what I'm used to, and it'd be something to do eh? The company itself seems pretty good, so there are worse things I could be doing I suppose. I'm not really holding my breath though, it takes a while to get back into the swing of doing interviews, so I'll probably mess this one up a bit.
There was something else I'd thought of just now, but its gone straight out of my head. Hmmm. Well, if it's important, I'm sure it'll come back to me.
There's an item on the news now about London's bid to win the 2012 Olympics, and the UKs approach is as pitiful as you'd expect. Yesterday Paris went mad and had concerts and turned the Champs Elysees into a mini-olympic stadium, whilst London... got a digital clock, which doesn't even work. My country ladies and gentleman, as half-arsed as anyone could want. Even if the UK did win the bid, I don't want the olympics to be in London, put them somewhere else! This whole country doesn't revolve around London, no matter how much Londoners like to think it does. I'd suggest maybe going to the second city, Birmingham, or how about Liverpool, or Manchester? Why not Edinburgh? The whole 'everything has to be in London or its not relevant' thing really gets my goat. *ahem* Not that it matters, 'cos we're not going to win, Paris is.
That is all.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Prevent This Tragedy

Goddammit but I'm watching fucking GOLF! Jesus I must be bored.
I've already watched one movie this morning (I like morning movies though, they're fun), and done company research for my interview on Tuesday and worked out where I've got to go, had lunch and its still barely this afternoon.
....
Grrrrr

Saturday, June 04, 2005

As Exciting As It Sounds

Well so far Saturday has been tolerable. I successfully resisted my pitiful urge for human companionship last night, and actually slept pretty well. I woke up far too early for my liking, didn't get any post (although to be fair I'm also not really expecting anything), and then had a nice long bath whilst listening to Rufus.
Oh yeah he was great on ...Later last night, and The Coral were on too, which was excellent. Odd to think that only a year ago I dismissed them as not being of any interest. I wonder if my musical tastes are changing on some fundamental level, or if they are just broadening and deepening. Not that it really matters, I just wonder these things when I've got nothing else to do. There was also a really weird, but oddly entertaining bloke on, called Son Of Dave, who was basically like one a man blues band, with harmonica and human beat boxing. I realise it sounds very peculiar, and it truly is, but also really fun. Sadly New Order were also on, and they just ruined it for me. I'll admit that way back in the 80s they had some good moments (Blue Monday springs irresistibly to mind) but since then... they're just embarrasingly like 'cool' dads. I realise that I myself am starting to get to that age (if I'm not there already), but at least I have excellent bedhair today. AND I know I dance embarrasingly, so I don't do it on national television.
This morning I went shopping in Wellingborough just to kill some time and as an excuse to drive my car fast down nice roads. I'm sure that will wear off eventually, but I don't think its coming any time soon.
And now its this afternoon and I wonder what delights I can surprise myself with for the rest of the weekend. Not many, I suspect.

Friday, June 03, 2005

Must Resist Dark Side!

The thing that is being hardest about today is the certain knowledge that I'm not going to interact with another human being for the next four days.
Some days I'm okay with that, I'm not hugely gregarious or anything and I enjoy doing my own thing. But other days, like today, it seems a terrible burden. I'm sorely tempted to do something stupid, but I also know I won't cos that would complicate life too much, and hurt people (well, one person) I don't ever want to hurt. Also I'm not really the 'doing something stupid' sort. Still, I really don't want to sleep alone tonight... Guess I'll have to take Bagpuss with me, eh?
So what have I actually done today apart from moping about?
Ermmmm...
Looked for jobs, obviously. That went well I think, found another couple of interesting things to apply for (one of them is for a visual merchandiser, which'd be great, I love that stuff). I killed a lot of spiders that were stupid enough to be in places where I could find them. Then I watched a movie, in fact I finally forced myself to watch Alien 3 on DVD. I bought the whole Alien quadrilogy (as Fox calls it - I doubt that quadrilogy is an actual word) ages ago when they were on sale, and I watched Alien and Aliens straight off, cos they both rock. But Alien 3 had been a roadblock for me, cos I remember seeing it when it first came out, and it being shit. But the cool thing about all the Alien DVDs is that they have directors cuts on them in addition to the theatrical cut (although Fincher won't let anyone call the Alien 3 one the directors cut, he insists it be called the directors work print), and damn me if the extended version doesn't make it a radically better film. Its over half and hour longer, and as is always the case with these things, it expands on character (oddly the first thing the studios cut, cos apparently we, the viewing public, just like to see 90 minutes of things exploding for no reason) and actually makes the story coherent. Admittedly its still nothing like the original story that Vincent Ward wrote (I personally would have loved to see Alien versus monks on a low tech world with no metal and covered in massive trees), but its actually not the embarrasing train-wreck that the original release was, and might even be a worthy addition to the series.
I'll be fucked if I know what I'm going to do for the rest of the evening though. I started to watch The Empire Strikes Back, but shockingly wasn't in the mood (see, thats how seroious this is). I think there's gonna be a Rufus show on later, so I'll probably watch that. He's oddly ubiquitous at the moment, cos I saw him on TV last night doing a little documentary about Verdi and out-lining why he's the coolest composer of classic music ever (apparently because he actually got better as he got older, and still enjoyed his work even as a 70 year old), and also why Rufus is going to write a symphony (because he's always wanted to).
I just feel very blah and listless, and I hate this.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Wrecks'n'Effect

Well first thing I did this morning was head straight down the council housing office and get that form handed it, along with all my 'supporting evidence'. Why they needed to see the past three months of bank statements I can't imagine, in fact at teh time I was sorting them out I was actually feeling pretty pissed off about the whole thing, but then I need their help, so I guess I have to jump through whatever hoops are deemed necessary. Plus the girl behind the counter was cute, so I wasn't mad or anything.
Then I came home to discover that two application forms I'd asked for last week had finally arrived, on the deadline for applications. So I filled them in as quickly as I could (which wasn't all that quickly really, don't want to make a mess of them, and I had a cup of tea, and wandered about a bit in the creative writing parts, and listened to the Foo Fighters, and ate half of this really nasty raspberry flapjack - yes this very one here that is still sitting on my desk taunting me), added explanatory notes as to why it was late (if it was, might've got there by this evening if I'm REALLY lucky) and then headed out for a postbox. Now normally I'd have either gone to the one just over the playing fields, or the one just by the main road. However in a somewhat controversial decision I went to Daventry, mainly as an excuse to drive my car (hehe) and also because I have exactly two friends in the entire of the UK and Erin is the other one, and I thought I'd go and visit her, cos I haven't seen her in a long while. She was working, naturally, although not terribly hard (so little changes), but she was super pleased to see me and very huggy, which was nice. So I hung out with her for a couple of hours, then I went and did a little grocery shopping, came home and I don't really know what I've done since I've been home. I know I've done some laundry and skimmed through this months issue of Q for interesting gigs (of which there are a few - Athlete are even touring AGAIN in October, that'll make three times this year, although sadly not close enough to me to go, which is a pity. Maybe they'll add extra dates), and read their overly gushing review of the new Coldplay and overly harsh review of the new Foo Figthers.
Speaking of Athlete as I was (parenthetically, a moment ago) I was listening to Vehicles & Animals on the way home and I was singing along (badly) as usual, but when I got to the track Vehicles & Animals I was suddenly in tears! Which is weird, cos that one has never done it to me before. I mean, I suppose if any of them is likely to reduce me to a quivering wreck it would be that one, with its lament for lost childhood and desire to cling to innocence, but it had never had that effect on me before. Weird. At least I was nearly home. Oh man though, I don't know what it is about that last bit of road to Daventry though, the section after Flore, but dammit I have NEVER seen so many cars that have clearly been drunkenly driven into trees or ditches in my life! I know one day when I was coming back from Daventry I was a couple of cars back from a head on collision which was pretty scary, although the thing I remember most about it was that I REALLY needed a pee, and had to wait while the Police took statements, the firebrigade came and cut people out of wrecks, and ambulances took shattered bodies to hospitals. Seemed to take forever at the time.
Remember what I said a couple weeks ago about this country going to hell in a hand basket? Well this one takes the fucking cake. A group of kids (like 8 to 10 year olds) are being held on suspicion of attempted murder after they attempted to hang a five year old. Its got so many echos of the Bulger case that I just... I despair. I mean I really honestly don't understand what goes through the minds of these kids, I really don't. There must be something going horribly wrong in their upbringing if they are so dissociated from the people around them that hanging another child seems like a good way to spend a Saturday afternoon. I realise that there is also an element of hysteria in that too, but much like Thompson and Venables, how do you deal with children like that? Do you just give up, throw away the key and keep them inside forever, assuming them to be irredeemable? Or do you try and take that tragedy and make something worthwhile out of it? I don't know, I honestly don't. I do know what those two (Thompson and Venables) did to Jamie (Bulger), and it was premeditated and deliberate, hell they even arranged the body so that his death would appear accidental. They understood what they were doing, and they wanted to do it anyway. Maybe this new thing isn't gonna be anything like that, I hope it'll turn out to be something else entirely, but I just don't know what it could be that is any better...
Of course it's not like these sorts of occurences are anything new or modern, things like this have always happened, its just that these days they're widely reported and talked about, whereas forty, fifty, a hundred whatever years ago, they were hidden, and villages and towns had things that no-one talked about. So I don't suppose things are really any worse, it just feels that way sometimes.
This is what you get when I type an entry while I'm watching the news. I'd say I'm not gonna do this in future, but we all know that'd be a lie, I'm gonna do this as much as I bloody well like!
Just remember the early part of the post, where things were happy and good stuff was happening. Then go listen to some happy music!

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Rain Rain Go Away Go Away!

I was worried this was going to happen. I didn't take my shorts off yesterday afterall, and now look! Rain! Serious rain too, the kinda that gets ya wet!
In more news that makes me extremely grumpy the council sent me yet another form to fill out, this one being due back tomorrow with all supporting evidence! The form itself amusingly claims to have been sent out at the start of May, but I don't think it was cos I only got it this morning. I can't wait to be employed again and not be dependant on benefits, and the morons who administer them. Luckily I have all the stuff I need (at least I think I do, I've checked it a couple of times already, and I'll check it again before I take it in tomorrow), so it could've been a lot worse I suppose.
Ooooooooo yeah and in good news I have two interviews next week! One is for retail work, and the other is somthing more office based. I feel pretty pleased with that, lets hope the interviews go well and I get to choose which job I take! That'd be pretty sweet eh?
France voting 'non' on the whole European constitution thing is still causing much confusion over here. As far as I understand it, that pretty much means that the constitution can't be ratified, cos one rejection spoils it for everyone. Whats really weird is that France was the one to say it. I mean, they're pretty much at the centre of the European project, I expected the UK to torpedo the whole thing, cos for some reason this country just doesn't approve of socialism, or Europe, or foreigners in general. So it was interesting to see that the French have exactly the same reservations about the whole thing that we do. What is even more bizarre though, is the fallout from the no vote. I don't know if this is normal or not, but the French president has appointed a new prime minister (which is weird in and of itself when you think about it), and the guy is someone who has NEVER contested an election in his life, let alone won one. That just seems really really wrong to me, although I'm not (even a little bit) French, so maybe its perfectly normal for them...
I'm sure I had something else I wanted to talk about, but I can't think what it was. Probably a lie then, eh? If it comes back to me, I'm sure I'll return!

The Importance of Being Idle