The Importance of Being Idle

The Hunted Child

I hardly slept at all last night, weird dreams haunted by weirder imagery and today I just feel... flat, uninvolved, disinterested. Which can't be good, can it?
I've been thinking about the whole monastery thing some more, and while it seems tempting, there's a part of me that also thinks its just giving up on life. Waving the white flag, admitting I can't do this, and running away to a place where none of it matters. It's weird, cos when I think about being cloistered like that, I think about all the things I want to see and do in the outside world, and then I realise that I'm not actually doing anything to achieve these goals anyway...
Blah.
And I found out the most depressing thing ever: a recent survey of the microwave background has revealed that the universe is going to expand forever. I'd always liked the idea that it would collapse down to a single point, and then start over again (implying that it had done this infinitely many times before, and would keep doing so indefinitely), but apparently its just going to expand forever, heading towards its eventual cold entropic lonely death. This of course raises a lot of weird questions about what happened BEFORE the universe came about, and how anything could come about when there is no space time for it to come about in, and then it asks questions about the uniqueness of the universe... but bugger all that, I always found comfort in the idea that it was all going to collapse down and start again, whereas this whole entropic death I find really disturbing. Which is odd, because I'll obviously be dead within the next fifty years and what happens after that won't really matter to me. Human beings eh?
I told you this week was gonna be tough didn't I?

posted by BadMonkey @ 11:21 AM