The Importance of Being Idle

The Worlds Worst

Instead of finishing training like normal folk, we've been stuck straight out onto the phones for the past few days, and I suck at it. Yesterday wasn't too bad as we were only call pulling (essentially taking details for someone else to call back) but today we were taking calls for real and I just came apart. I couldn't remember even the simplest thing, couldn't get my systems access right and I just unravelled like a poorly hand knitted scarf. To make matters worse, my supervisors and co-workers were all really nice and understanding, at a time when I didn't feel I deserved niceness at all. After a bit of time calming down I went back on the phones again, but only buddying this time and seeing how other people handle calls and systems and whatnot. It was surprisingly enlightening.
What I'm finding so frustrating is that I HAVE all the information and knowledge inside my head, and under test conditions it comes out perfectly. Stick me in a live situation though and although I know the job I just cannot for the very life of me do it. You wouldn't think that talking to someone on the telephone was a particularly taxing task, but I just don't seem to be able to master it. Whether I'm pushing too far too fast or simply expecting to be able to run before I can walk, I'm finding it an immensely distressing experience, and knowing that I have to go back and suck at it again tomorrow is incredibly demoralising. We can only hope that I suck a little bit less each day, until I finally become vaguely competent.
It wasn't all bad though, to cheer me up Ronnie bought me the Saw trilogy boxset, which I've been rather excited about for some time. Now my Saw marathon can finally be a go! Although obviously it'd have to be on a night when Ronnie's not in, 'cos she doesn't like the movies at all...

posted by BadMonkey @ 7:56 PM