The Importance of Being Idle

Adventure Day!

Yesterday was a fun day. Ronnie's shoulder hurt so much she didn't go into work (okay, that's not the fun part) then we spent the morning in bed watching sit-coms and went out on an adventure in the afternoon. Initially we went looking for a Japanese Garden centre out by Kings Lynn, but we didn't find that at all (I don't think it even exists anymore, if it ever did) and we just sort of adventured off from then, following random road signs and things that looked interesting until there was no more road left and we were on the coast. Then we wandered along the sea front, out onto the pier just after the sun had gone down, then we decided it was time to head for home! It was only then that we realised how far we'd come! Still it was a good day, the sort of day we haven't had in a long time, since I first became sick.
And now I'm not sick.
I've got to go see the doctor this afternoon to get myself signed back on for my return to work tomorrow and I am just a total bag of nerves, I can't seem to settle to anything. I don't even know what's making me nervous; I know I've got the awkward doctor this afternoon, but she never thought I was sick in the first place so I don't see why she should have a problem signing me back on, and as for work, well they don't expect me to do anything either, they're putting me on a training course. I suppose it's just been such a long time since I've been at work I'm putting all this pressure on myself to be brilliant and perfect when I really can't be. I'm worried that my health will fail me again, I'm worried that I won't be able to remember anything, that I won't be able to do the job, that I'll just fall apart. I've never had to doubt my health before, and now it's failed once I'm suddenly distrustful of it. I know it's stupid to put extra stress on myself, and I'm really trying not to, but I'm (apparently) only human!

posted by BadMonkey @ 1:58 PM